Author: Lucretia Cahill

40 Reflections #32: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

Nearly every night my son and I read out of a book titled, “365 Days to Knowing God for Guys”. The book was a gift from his Catechism teachers a few years ago. This is our second time through. Tonight’s lesson brought my three favorite subjects together: family, faith and fitness. It was a brief statement about our bodies need for nutritious fuel and not junk food. It reminded me of the carefree philosophy I employed in my 20’s when I was logging numerous miles per day (numerous means greater than or equal to four).

My logic was run to eat. I love food. Spicy, sweet, savory, bread, tortillas, burnt tortillas, more bread, all of it. So in my younger years, when eating out was ALWAYS an option, I would enjoy the delicious cuisine Washington, DC had to offer, and ‘run it all off’ (ha!) the next day. Ahh, a clean slate. Now, a teeny-tiny bit older, I’ve learned I truly need to eat to run. Healthy, clean food has a way of ensuring a smooth, run. It’s the one thing I can control as my body creaks like Oz’s Tin Man, but shorter, and with more heart.

The “365” book states: “Have you ever thought about the fact that your heart and soul are the same…to be able to stand strong for God you’ve got to feed your soul healthy food, and that comes from God’s Word…”.

Respecting our bodies through exercise and our souls with prayer will indeed frame our lives with a healthy scaffolding to support us emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

Time to sleep so we can make it to our daughter’s swim meet. Sometimes I wish the body and soul balance would happen a little later than 6:00 am.

Dig Deep: Combine runs with rosary’s, strength training with sacrifice, and endurance with adoration.

Lenten Challenge: How will you spend your Holy Week? Incorporate more prayer? Fast each day? Who will you pray for? Think about it today.

40 Reflections #31: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

When I first met my sweet husband, I never wondered. I may have ‘mused’, or ‘imagined’, even ‘guessed’. Maybe I ‘bet’ things were going to happen. But my hubby? He wondered. About everything.

“I wonder if it will rain…I wonder where I put my wallet…I wonder if I threw it out…I wonder why the dogs are barking again(!). Sometimes he’s “wondering if”. “I’m wondering if the kids heard me the first 12 times I called…I’m wondering if any homework is being completed on those devices.” Don’t we all.

It didn’t take me long to begin my own line of wondering. I wonder if the papers left on our kitchen island need to be in someone’s backpack, or if the trumpet I tripped over should be at school buzzing the theme to Star Wars. I cautiously wonder if our daughter should get her driver’s permit, or if the eight hours our kids spend in school have instances of laughter woven in between the stress, and I wonder if traffic surrounding my husband on his commute home will be texting and rushed, or calm and sensible.

To wonder is a basic curiosity, a question, or speculation. I read the novel “Wonder” by R.J. Palacio to our kids a few years ago, and embraced each character as they traversed through their lives with the main character, Auggie Pullman, a boy born with a genetic, facial abnormality. The story holds our hand as we plod through the emotionally draining days with Auggie. Many of his feelings mirroring our own to a degree, as he experiences the exhaustion of bullies, the warmth of friends, and the solace of family.

About five minutes into the movie, “Wonder” I cried and didn’t stop until my eyes puffed out so much I looked like I may have won the fight I was in. The story celebrated differences, visited sacrifice and friendship, touched on caring, feeling different, faith in humanity, disconnecting and reconnecting, finding the amazing in our children, accepting others, changing the way we see each other, and honoring quiet strength. Please see this movie. You will be a better person for doing so.

Maybe I have always wondered. I certainly wondered if I would ever marry a great guy, and I did. Time to look for my keys, I’m wondering if I threw them out.

Dig Deep: Don’t wonder if you’re going to run, exercise, or take time for yourself, do it!

Lenten Challenge:

A person with wonder and awe knows that God is the perfection of all we desire: perfect knowledge, perfect goodness, perfect power, and perfect love. ~THE SEVEN GIFTS OF THE HOLY SPIRIT

 

40 Reflections #30: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

Every night about this time (9:45-10:00 pm) our children are finally in bed. One tucked in with her Geometry homework blanketed over her, another listening to any sports event available on the radio, and finally our Rumpelstiltskin, engineering products upstairs and tossing them over the ledge to the living room upon completion for our review. This is also the time I sit down to write my Lenten Blog which has become a cathartic part of my day.

Within the last few months, I’ve heard this maxim numerous times:

Saying No to One Thing Means Saying Yes to Another

Throughout the last 30 days of Lent, I’ve made the decision to say yes to something I had only contemplated while staying home with my brood, during PTA meetings, working various jobs, making dinner, while praying, and definitely during my runs. Clearly, I had not mastered saying no to the non-stop activities our lives bring, until Lent began. At that point, I made the lofty decision to say yes to sharing my words, my family, and my take on it all, for 40 days. However, yin must have yang, so I had to say no to a few things to balance the yes. NO to sleep (overrated), NO to watching too much news, NO to picking up the book I’ve been grazing through for the last month, and NO to few things I’m forgetting due to lack of sleep.

The No’s in our lives are prevalent. When teaching today, I told a PreK student to clean up the Legos, and in a hearty southern tone, I received a “No, Ma’am!”. Sounds nice-r, but unless the Legos were southern and dipped in charm, they aren’t going to clean themselves up. At home, we typically don’t receive core-driven, spoken “No’s” just the lack of action that speaks louder than the two-letter exclamation. The teeth that aren’t brushed (no), the clothes strewn on bedroom floors (no), or the unwashed pan sitting on the counter (no). As parents, it’s taxing to parse through the no’s and understand what our children are saying yes to…freedom…independence…control?

We’re all searching for a heli-pad for our yes’s to land on. Yes to more prayer, hugs, kindness, family time, humility, plain old goodness, and deep hearty laughter. I’m grateful I said yes to sharing my story. It really is worth every. single. yawn.

Dig Deep: Say no to over-volunteering and yes to taking care of yourself! Run!

Lenten Challenge: A great quote, below…

“Oh, my God. What if you wake up some day, and you’re 65 or 75, and you never got your novel or memoir written; or you didn’t go swimming in warm pools or oceans because your thighs were jiggly or you had a nice big comfortable tummy; or you were just so strung out on perfectionism and people-pleasing that you forgot to have a big juicy creative life, of imagination and radical silliness and staring off into space like when you were a kid? It’s going to break your heart. Don’t let this happen.” ~ Anne Lamott

40 Reflections #29:

40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

Last Tooth – Braces Train

In an effort to help our daughter stay at a good braces pace (off before high school), it was recommended she have a few teeth pulled. When I say a few, I lie. Five teeth. Five! So nearly two years ago we had those teeth yanked and are STILL awaiting the arrival of the new dental dignitaries. Not an easy task when you’re 15.

One thing you should know about our daughter’s character is how it oozes with humility, wit, and just the right amount of fierce needed to reel in her brothers. Simply put, she is a good sport. Not only in the sense of someone who helps their teammate up after a tumble, but that person who has the rare ability to find humor and calm in the hand they were dealt, even if they don’t like playing cards. In her case it’s teeth that need time to grow. Good things do come to those who wait, but two years?

Not surprisingly, at our last appointment with the Orthodontist, she was handed a little yellow slip requesting one more tooth be pulled. I REALLY questioned the pull this time. They showed me where the new tooth was peeking out from behind the goner, so we decided to do it. Always trying to save money, our gal wiggled that tooth for two days straight. As stubborn as the rest, the tooth held strong, and we decided to go to the dentist, and have her LAST baby tooth pulled. No cute tooth necklace this time, just a little container I placed carefully in my purse for safekeeping. The end of an era.

In today’s world, going through orthodontia is as common as watching a DIY YouTube video to learn how to take apart the washing machine and find out what the heck is clanging around in there…maybe that’s just me.

Really, it’s rampant. In fact, at a recent dentist appointment, my husband was told he’d be a perfect candidate for Invisalign, the secret straighteners. After he was told the cost, and stopped laughing, he declined. We both agree there’s a point in life when we’re just too old for some things. So far braces and hoover boards are at the top of the list.

Dig Deep: Happy First Day of Spring! Spend some time gardening and prep the ground for planting yummy vegetables.

Lenten Challenge: Fast from self-concern; feast on compassion for others.

 

40 Reflections #28:

40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

Lost tooth

August of 2009, our daughter realized something was happening to her tooth. She was seven-years-old, and most days, our walk home from the bus included at least one story about a friend losing a tooth, and the sparkly tooth necklace they toted home. In various attempts to play with her loose tooth, she wiggled it with two fingers, moved on with the single finger jiggle, and then discovered her tongue could enlist her tooth to dance. As most kids under 10, she hoped her tooth would fall out at school where lost tooth recipients received a free trip to the nurse’s office, where the tooth holder necklaces were stashed in the bottom file drawer. Much to her dismay, later that day while playing with her brothers, the tooth fell out in the backyard lawn, was rescued, placed in a homemade tooth necklace, and later set gently under her pillow.

Fast forward eight years. Throughout this time, waiting for our daughter’s teeth to fall out was like watching paint dry. Truly there was no rush. Some things just need to happen naturally, right? That’s what we thought…until talk of “small jaws” were slipped into the description of our children’s mouths. Awe. Sounds cute. But then, much like a baton passed in the 400 relay, a little piece of paper from the dentist was handed to us encouraging orthodontia services. After googling ‘orthodontia’ my first thought was, “who even uses that word?” and second, I realized all the chatter about braces was true. These metal wonders cast a wide net. Everyone from ages 7-60 were donning colorful mouths, and pockets filled with teeny rubber bands, special floss, and disposable toothbrushes. All were welcome.

So without looking back (not sure why), we picked the best (aka – most economical) orthodontist we could find. A gem of a man who understood my matter-of-factness when I told him we did NOT want the multi-round plan. That’s when kids get braces right after they kick the diaper habit, give their mouths a break while they learn to walk, and then jump back into the metal molds by grade school. Perhaps a slight exaggeration. We settled on the standard package with a 5% discount when paid in full, and as many tiny containers of floss you can “acquire” upon exiting.

Now that we’ve paid our admission for the braces roller coaster, our trips to the orthodontist are more frequent than our Costco runs. Maybe it’s just me, but either kid’s teeth are growing in looking as haphazard as the megalithic monument Stone Henge, or impeccable, movie star teeth are now the norm. Have you seen anyone under 40? Great pearly whites.

Growing up in the 70’s, our family dentist, Dr. Johnston had a hardy laugh and reading glasses permanently perched on the tip of his nose as he peered into our small-jawed mouths (oh, genetics). While we waited, my sisters and I marked up the well-loved stack of Highlights while rave reviews of “no cavities!” was hollered boisterously from the back of the office. We’d happily head home, and mom would mark the calendar for six months when we’d see our jolly dentist again.

You see, back then, moms like mine possessed the orthodontist super power. This braces radar, or “BRADAR” was so powerful, with one glance at their children’s smile, they could determine whether they truly needed braces. 9/10 times, the answer was no. Sometimes, moms could transfer these stellar abilities to their children and let them decide whether they wanted braces or not. Brilliant. Was the word orthodontia mentioned? Never.

In today’s world, orthodontia is as common as watching youtube for a diy project, and so far, our small-jawed children are fairing well.

Stay tuned, for Part 2 of Lost Tooth, Last Tooth, I’ll take you for a ride on the braces train.

Dig Deep: Healthy lifestyles include exercise, nutrition, sleep, AND good oral health. After your run, remember to floss!

Lenten Challenge: Ensure the reflection you see in the mirror is what God wants you to be…embrace your gifts, even if your smile is slightly crooked.

40 Reflections #27: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

I’ve run a lot of races in my day. I’ve also lost a lot of races. My running career started out like most kids with “race you to the end of the road” competitions. Of course we were always a little more motivated if a dog was chasing us. During grade school in New Mexico, I remember running one specific 100-yard dash on the last day of school. Dust was circling the air (grass was not part of our play scape), my feet felt like they were skimming the ground just enough to spring into flight with each stride. I thought for sure I had a chance to break the tape, or rather cross the line drawn with a stick, first.

Then, it happened. The moment your mind accelerates but fails to let your white Keds tennis shoes know you can win this thing. Naturally, your uninformed feet begin their tumble, knees hit the dirt, white shoes fade to earth tones, and you realize you’ve lost, again. But you’re ten, and who cares?

My kids are a little older than I was when my face met the dirt in the 100-yard dive/dash. I’ve noticed a lot has changed since I was younger. Kids are smarter, faster, and have tried everything (aka: well-rounded). For instance, a 4.0 GPA, while stellar in my day, is more commonplace, compared to the 4.6 prospective Valedictorians desire. Throw a 5k at today’s middle school runner and they’ll fly through it, hang their medal on their door knob as they walk in the door to practice their cello, polish up on their Mandarin, and finally wrap up their STEM project showing how to maximize the electrical output of a wind turbine.

For  better or worse, today’s child does so much more than I ever attempted. That’s why I love running. Everyone can do it, and truly everybody wins FOR doing it. From ½ marathons to 5k’s, I’ve learned I’m never going to win, but at the finish line I’m going to crush the senior citizen I’ve been trailing the last mile.

I loved the feeling I had at 10 when I thought I had a win. Was falling in my plan? No. Is it ever? Everybody stumbles. Even Jesus fell three times, got up, and stood strong. As we take risks in life, we discover what is worth falling for, in the hope we arise stronger and wiser. The key is to wipe the dust off your Keds, and toe the line drawn on the ground one more time.

Dig Deep: Sign up for a race. Knowing you have it scheduled will make it easier to train. Watch your step. 🙂

Lenten Challenge: Go to the Stations of the Cross next Friday. Remember, we all fall, even Jesus.

 

40 Reflections #26: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

Since 2002, I have written a journal about our family musings. Primarily this endeavor was to chronicle the funny moments in childhood parents just can’t make up. Other days logging my thoughts gave me an outlet to vent my feelings somewhere other dumping them on my dear husband the instant he stepped in the door. Today, this journal serves as a virtual memory keeper for me as it seems busy days blend altogether like the brown Easter egg dipped in every color on the table.

Yesterday I was helping my daughter study for “AP Human Geography” referred to as “AP Human” amid high school students. To parents, I think the AP stands for “A Plethora” of reading about Human Geography, but apparently it’s something different. After studying, I asked my daughter for suggestions on blog topics. She proposed writing a “Throwback Thursday” post about something from their younger years. Perfect idea! Here it is.

Note: when I asked my daughter if I could use her name, she declined, one of my boys simply stated, “sure, I’ll be famous someday anyway.” My theory, if one says no, it’s no.

THROWBACK THURSDAY

On a cold day in December 2014, I jotted down a few words after a stressful day. The kids were 7, 8, and 9 at the time. Maybe you can relate to the events, or even the sentiment attached.

Overwhelmed

• Our daughter said she “hates” school, ballet, and clothes. This was this morning on our drive to school.

• Our middle son threatened to put tape over his brother’s mouth and made his little brother punch himself with his own hand.

• Our youngest couldn’t think of any compound words!

• One son is making random sounds that make me want to scream.

• I bought our daughter tights for Chorus tomorrow night and our dog Lola took them outside, ran around with them and pierced holes in them like Swiss cheese.

• The baby talk is out of hand.

• (And the Mother of the year award goes to…) After frustrating words about homework were exchanged, I told our son I don’t care if he stays in fourth grade for the REST OF HIS LIFE, and he said, “Me either, then I’ll be the smartest in the class.”

• I need to make cookies for school tomorrow as a special dessert for our daughter’s class on her birthday.

• Our daughter told the boys she thinks Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer is questionable and the elf is something you just buy.

A tough day for me, that’s all.

Ever have a day like this? Kids or no kids, 10 or 1, some days can wring out your spirit. I still have moments like these. The characters are the same, feelings are similar, only the topics have changed from ballet to bullies, reindeer to technology, and special desserts to stressful GPA’s. Gratefully, the pleasurable days outnumber the tricky, but more importantly all of my children passed the fourth grade.

Dig Deep: Take a rest day and journal. Sharing the written word is cathartic.

Lenten Challenge: Pick a Bible verse and share it with your children.

40 Reflections #25: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

For the last three months, I have rescheduled my physical exam.

Three times!

Here’s why:

1. SNOW. In Georgia.

I actually made it to my first appointment. I maneuvered through the rare Georgia snow, and upon arrival, I was told the office had to close so the employees could drive home before the roads iced. I was able to have my blood drawn, only to find out the office was unable to send my blood to the lab for testing due to the aforementioned snow. I hastily rescheduled over the phone, taking the next date available.

2. SCALES

Unfortunately, the next quick appointment I made was slated for immediately after the holiday season. I’d like to think I was less vain than this, but honestly, the thought of perching myself on a scale after my busiest cookie consuming month of the year, was nauseating. Those 5 seconds on the scale could crush a gal. Plus, everyone knows summer is optimal for the weigh in, less clothes, and slip off shoes. Of course there’s always a chance there’s a nice nurse who will shave off a few pounds for clothes.

3. SUBSTITUTING

I substitute teach as often as I can while ensuring my presence at home is just enough for the kids to know I’m around. Much like the “potted plant theory”. This is when your kids get older and you’re their potted plant: close by so they know you’re there, but silent, non-invasive, and mobile.

Tomorrow is my appointment, no excuses. I’m ready to pee in a cup, kick my knee up when the hammer hits, talk about the vegetables I should eat, and try and to decipher the zillion acronyms like BMI, PAP, HPV…UGH.

Physical exams are critical to maintain optimal health, develop plans of prevention as needed, establish a family medical history, and build a positive rapport with your doctor. Sure standing on the scale and getting blood drawn are not my favorite hobbies, but luckily, taking care of my family and myself is. Please make a healthy lifestyle your priority.

Dig Deep: Plan your annual physical today! Hint: schedule for summer.

Lenten Challenge: While you wait at the doctor’s office, which you inevitably will, pray for the health of people in the room with you.

 

40 Reflections #24: 40 days of raw recollections during the Lenten Season

Every time I prep the calendar for the month, my pen draws an arrow covering another week with the words fall, winter, or spring break. I love having the kids home, but there’s a different feel as they get older. A tub of tinker toys, play dough and coloring doesn’t have the same draw as when they were toddling around.

Rarely do we travel over these week-long respites. Instead we declare them “Stay-cations!” Nope, it’s not even a word, but, when said enthusiastically, you can alter the “mind-set” (over-used education word) of your kids and turn at least one out of the seven days into a mind-blowing experience. I guarantee the other six days will involve a fine balance of play, leisure, drama, and bickering…laced in love, of course.

Prior to each upcoming break, we hear all the dazzling destinations friends will be enjoying: cruises, beaches, Disney, even trips to Grandma’s lake house. Navigating away from comparison a few years ago, I researched local activities, and Google offered me 116 million ideas. However, dangling at the end of my new Google search, was the word “FREE” immediately eliminating about 100 million of our options. Not bad. I began my planning. Our theme? Free Fun! When I say fun, I mean it was fun, because it was free.

Three For Free:

1. First off, we hitched onto a homeschool tour at an Anne Frank Museum located in a strip mall nestled nicely between a Best Buy and a Barbershop. Not completely encompassing the Amsterdam feel, yet fascinating, educational, and well, free.
2. We also had a gift card day when we decided to use gift cards that had sat a few years because the establishments were outside of our 15 mile radius. One day we schlepped to Buckhead, visited a charming Catholic Church – we “happened” upon (during noon mass-smack in the middle-oops), and then scooted over to a fancy deli. With $10 on the gift card we were determined not to spend a penny more. So, we ordered a BLT, one sprite, and three straws. Bewildered, the cashier asked if we wanted anything else, “No sir, we’re fine”. Thinking we were living out of our car, he gave us a ‘you’re not from Buckhead’ look, which is simply a sad smirk accompanied by about three nods of the head. The kids were pleased with their BLT and the drink since they were hungry…not the ‘this is our only meal-hungry’ just the ‘we drove to Atlanta-hungry’. We loaded up in the car and headed home.                      Memorable Moment: The splitting of the sandwich took me back to our daughter’s kindergarten days when I directed her to bring home ANY candy she was given at school. One day she arrived with a Dum Dum lollipop which measured about a quarter inch circumference. We took the hammer to it, multiplying the sugary asset, and split it between our three amigos. What a wacky mom I am.
3. We rounded out the week by visiting the Governor’s Mansion. We caught the tail end of free touring day and spent the bulk of our time visiting with the kind-hearted 1st Lady. She explained the history of the great room, the trading of tea, and kept our liberal family engaged.

Once we made our way out, we fled home and just relaxed, reflecting on the tribulations of The Frank Family, the pillars made from oak at the Governor’s Mansion, and of course, the delicious BLT. Maybe next break, which is coming right up, we’ll go crazy and head to Starbuck’s or if they’re lucky, go to the car wash (almost Disney).

Dig Deep: On a school break? Homeschooling? Take your kids outside. Find a track, playground, or some good dirt and just run, jump, and play.

Lenten Challenge: Add some Catholic tunes, or a calming podcast to your running playlist. Prayer and meditation is powerful.