Month: March 2024

Posted in Family, Faith and Fitness

Gifts from my sisters…

Posted on by Lucretia Cahill

#19 Lenten Reflections

Mom and Dad have always referred to us, their daughters as, “The Girls”. Since I live the furthest from my dear parents I don’t get the daily dose of them, but thanks to my sisters, I get the gifts of stories and photos.

Here’s a sampling:

Every night around 7:00 pm EST I get a text from one of my sisters that says:

✅ Meds Done!

That means Mom has been called and has taken her medicine. My oldest sister usually calls Alexa with the camera where you can see/spy on the goings-on in the kitchen and will talk Mom through it. Thanks to my super caretaker sister, we have a perfectly designed medicine chart and color-coded dots on all the bottles to make it easier. When I call to help her, Mom will say jokingly, “Are you just going to watch us all day from that thing?”

Sometimes one of us will call the landline during “Meds for Mom” and Dad will answer hastily, so excited to connect everyone on the devices. “Hey! We’ve got Lucretia on the Alexa, say hi!” We all say hello in our sing-songy voices and then one of us says we’ll call back.

On Thursdays, I get a picture of a bountiful bunch of fruits and vegetables from the “Food Pharmacy” a program where local farms and my parent’s hospital arrange delivery of in-season produce for Senior Citizens. Something to look forward to and a healthy addition to their meals.

On Mondays, I get a report of how the Pilates class went for Mom. My sister tells us whether the cool teacher, Richard, was there or if the substitute, “lady” ran the class. The “lady” (as mom calls her) is not great or, in other words, she’s not Richard.

Note: I’ve learned change isn’t great for anyone over 75. This is why they still make agitators in washing machines, regular Coca-Cola, and ironing boards. Therefore, when a newbie tries to win the hearts of senior citizens who simply want to stretch their bodies and maybe throw in a plank or two, she better connect with them quickly. (Maybe she could talk about her love for clotheslines).

After Pilates, I get a picture like this from the Casino where Mom and Dad have breakfast with the “gang”, enjoy their free coffee, and then disperse throughout the casino to play their games of choice.

Here are Dad’s tips to make the most of their casino time: 1) Play only nickel slots 2) Each person starts with $10 3) Everyone takes turns and is supportive 4) If your $10 is dwindling, keep trying new machines with the remaining money 5) Leave immediately if you are winning big OR have spent the allotted allowance.

Finally, my favorite photos are when I see Mom and Dad doing the things they love like working outside or making chili…just like the good old days.

I’m so lucky to have “The Girls” and Mom and Dad and blessed with updates and glimpses into their day.

Thanks for joining me…I pray you and yours are connecting as often as makes you happy,

❤️Lucretia

Posted in Family, Faith and Fitness

What does it mean to be Real?

Posted on by Lucretia Cahill

#18 Lenten Reflections

In the age of Botox and incessant social media, a story about authenticity might seem so 1900’s. However, my memory of the classic Velveteen Rabbit was jarred when I pondered my own search for meaning and what is real. No, I’m not going to get Botox…I mean, should I? No way. I mean, I’ll have three kids in college next year, and I don’t want them to forget what I look like when they fly back to the nest.

In the beloved children’s book, The Velveteen Rabbit, Margery Williams wrote, “Real isn’t how you are made… It’s a thing that happens to you,” In this story, the stuffed and somewhat feeble rabbit pined for connection, and love from a boy, but was tossed aside when other snazzy, noise-making toys were found under the Christmas tree.

Sometimes I have a Velveteen Rabbit Day and feel patchy, fragile, and a little weak in the joints. Those days when my gray roots are trying to take over the rest of my mop, or maybe I discover my jeans really are “mom jeans” or the moments I wish there was an epidural for standing up from the crisscross applesauce position.

That’s when I have to remember to embrace what is real — that sorrow is unavoidable, that joy is fleeting even when all the kids are home and laughter is nonstop, or when I talk to Mom and Dad and they are feeling “Great!”. Real is when time dissolves into quicksand and we must stand shoulder to shoulder taking one step at a time to make sense of the mess, together.

“Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’

‘Does it hurt?’ asked the Rabbit.

‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. ‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’

‘Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’

‘It doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse.

What I learned:

So even when we feel loose in the ligaments, and marred with physical and spiritual dents and dings, we should remember we are also in the process of becoming Real…but it really will take a long time.

Thanks for joining me,

❤️Lucretia

Posted in Family, Faith and Fitness

March Calendar – In like a lion out like a lamb…

Posted on by Lucretia Cahill

#17 Lenten Reflections

Every month I prepare a calendar on a chalkboard and hang it in our kitchen. Many months I’m a little late and in mid-February the kids will look at the calendar during dinner and say, “Wow, it’s STILL January?”

I remember when Dexter was in elementary school and he would say, “Mama, what day is it?” Thinking I was teaching him to use his resources I would say, “Just look at the calendar”. Years later Dexter said, “Why would you always say look at the calendar when I asked you what day it was? I never knew where to look because I didn’t know what day it was!” Oops.

Heck, I was new to the mom job. Turns out he asked his sister who I’m sure said or rather yelled, “It’s Tuesday!!! Don’t you listen at school?! Mama! Dexter doesn’t know it’s Tuesday!” Ahhh, the good old days.

Here is a timelapse video of me creating our monthly calendar. It’s just a little something that gives me a creative outlet, reminds me things can be erased and redone, and helps me appreciate what we have to look forward to each month.

Here’s last year’s

Thanks for joining me and take care,

❤️Lucretia

Posted in Family, Faith and Fitness

Parents, you are dismissed

Posted on by Lucretia Cahill

#16 Lenten Reflections

Today at my son’s game the pitcher’s mom arrived as her son finished warming up for the first pitch of the game. Flustered, she asked if she missed anything. My friend and I who are weathered moms and loaded with mom empathy, reassured her she was right on time and she didn’t miss a bit of her son pitching. Her shoulders dropped in relief as she looked up and saw her son throw the first pitch. The ball was hit and off it went over the center field fence. A home run. Oh s#$#! she said. We both said we were so sorry. Then she replied to the us and perhaps the universe, “It’s okay. That’s what happens, you just have to stay positive and get through the hard times. That’s what I tell my son.” Wow, she’s a calmer mom than I…she gathered her chair, leather bag with a baseball blanket sticking out, and her water bottle and headed off to cheer on her son. Clearly, not her first rodeo.

I mulled over the mom’s applause-worthy reaction and the role parents play as we wedge ourselves into our children’s activities, both financially and emotionally. Whether it’s a field or court, rink, track, or diamond, being a parent of an athlete is exhilarating and exhausting. Lord knows as hard as it is sometimes, we clearly don’t want to miss a moment of it, but sometimes we should probably consider stepping away to exhale.

Exhilarating for kids

Think about it. Sports are amazing for kids. The skill-building is endless. Teamwork, communication, winning losing, and having fun even through the rough moments. On my son’s team, they have to throw on their rain boots and transfer gallons of water off the baseball field tarp after a big rain…boom! Hard work! In the off-season, they show up at 5:30 every morning to workout as a team. Committment! Endless practice and extra hours at the batting cage build up their Dedication. They even print reminders on the back of their workout shirts like “Earn it!” or “Good Enough Needs Improvement!” just in case they forget they learned these priceless skills and must have them at the ready 24/7.

Exhausting for us

It’s all fun games until our kid is up to bat or on the blocks, that’s when the stress flows like the Ganges, but Mother Theresa is nowhere in sight to keep us grounded. Will they hit the ball? Will they reach for the wall first on the 100 freestyle? Will they return the serve? As parents we let ourselves live and die with every pitch, play, or punt. And how about the times when our kids sit on the bench? Or get disqualified? Or come in last? Or get replaced with a pinch hitter? Our hearts race and a steady stream of steam blows out of our ears.

As parents, we have no control…so will rituals help?

Call them superstitions, old wives’ tales, or a touch of Feng Shui, whatever the term, parents and any passionate fans have their reasons why they sit in a certain spot, wear a lucky shirt, or take the same route to the game. We truly think we are that powerful. Personally, I sometimes think filming our son while batting will lead him to strike out. Or if I yell something clever, like “Take a deep breath or Be aggressive!” That will send the ball soaring. But I have to do it every time if he hits or not at all if he doesn’t. I also know I will never wear my blue tank top with an American flag on it to a game because the last time I wore it, my son got hit in the eye with a ball. Call it crazy, or love, or ritualistic – mainly crazy.

There’s a funny story I read about a pitcher’s mom who, for years would pace behind bleachers, and cross her fingers while her son was on the mound. Once she actually kept her foot on a cooler for an entire game because her son’s team started losing when she took it off. She also was known to move people in the stands back to the seats they had when her team was winning or to new ones when they were losing. After all of the foot-holding on coolers and directing musical chairs, she finally decided the best way to truly relax at a game is to know you can’t do anything to change the lineup, the score, or the outcome of the game. It’s all up to the players and coaches- even though we don’t always agree with them.

I think back to when our kids were playing soccer and all the players took turns at goalie. Goalie. The last line of defense with a bunch of seven-year-olds charging for them. I could feel my heart race, my voice get louder, and my frantic pace speed up. Same if they pitch or have to kick a penalty shot or are the last leg of a race. Somehow, I make it about me. But these are not our games to play. They never are. We are their ride Home.

Parents, you are dismissed.

Sometimes we need to step off the sideline, climb down from the bleachers, fold up our chairs, and walk away. Some may feel living through their kids’ sporting events is an indicator of parental awesomeness. Gotta catch my son’s game, it’s waaay out in Canton. The bike race is at 7:00 am, and we’ll be leaving at 5:00 a.m! On a Saturday!

Author, Daniel Pink says “Compared to other parts of our children’s lives, sports are bizarrely parent-centric. We don’t gather in the back of algebra class and watch students solve quadratic equations. In music dance and theater, we don’t attend every single practice, lesson and rehearsal. We just show up for an occasional performance, keep our mouths shut and applaud like crazy when it’s over.” Imagine.

What I learned:

We throw out kids into “games of failure” like baseball and only want to see success. Any sign of struggle and we think we have to keep our children afloat, pushing bright orange water wings onto their arms. One for confidence and strength, the other for resilience and faith. But they float on without them and us.

Maybe if we remember sports are about the stories they tell and the friends they make and simply be their biggest fans in the crowd or from the car, waiting for them to tell you all about it. Good luck with that…

P.S.: To the level-headed pitcher’s mom – you should really stay. He did really well after the home run.

Thanks for joining me,

❤️Lucretia

Posted in Family, Faith and Fitness

Windy Days & Baseball

Posted on by Lucretia Cahill

#15 Lenten Reflections

Last week (and tonight) it was a crazy windy day at the Lake Pointe Baseball Complex in Emerson, GA. As I sat watching our son’s games, my hair whipped all over the place. No hair tie. Which is rare for me, like most girls or women with ponytail-ready hair, my wrist dons at least one hair tie. But that morning during class, I had a 4-year-old student who found it comforting and perhaps delicious to suck on the ends of her hair. So I helped put her damp, yet shiny hair in a very high ponytail so she could sing along to our Spanish songs.

Anyway, as I watched pitchers struggle and fly balls change direction like the wind in a sail, I wondered how these gales affected the game. So I did some research and discovered a guy named John Farley, the Chief Technology Officer for Weather Applied Metrics (see this link for an information video). The company measures weather impacts on baseball (and sports in general) using Computational Fluid Dynamics (CFD) modeling, standard trajectory physics, and other meteorological analysis. In short, they study sports and wind.

According to Farley,

“If the wind is blowing hard, that’s the most significant impact. A headwind, combined with a downdraft, can shorten a fly ball hit to the wall by as much as 60 feet. A tailwind, combined with an updraft can lengthen it by as much as 45 feet.”

He went on to say since baseballs absorb moisture from the air “the difference in distance between very dry air and very wet air is roughly 50 feet. That’s because a wet ball is slightly heavier and spongier, so it doesn’t come off the bat as fast. On a hotter day, the air is less dense and so a ball can travel as much as 30 feet farther, compared to a cold day.”

I got kind of lost in the technical jargon, but if I had to play in the wind, I’d prefer a tailwind on a hot day.

Windy at Wrigley Field

I found an example of a windy day at Wrigley Field in Chicago.

Apparently, when the wind is blowing the field is considered a “pitcher’s park”. The better the pitchers, the lower the score. When the wind is blowing out, especially if it is a brisk wind, Wrigley Field becomes a launching pad.

According to The Philidelphia Tale blog, one of the wildest games ever was played in 1979 between the Cubs and the Phillies. The Phillies staked starter Randy Lerch to a seven-run lead in the top of the first inning. He never made it through the bottom of the first. Long fly balls turned into home runs. Short fly balls approached or reached the warning track. Flares flew over the infield and landed well short of outfielders playing near the warning track.

A parade of pitchers from both teams got shelled and watched ERAs soar. The Phillies finally won the game 23–22.

Players take on the wind: Look at the Flag for guidance

Larry Bowa, Phillies shortstop: “I remember the flag was stiff. After I left (Philadelphia) and played there (1982-85), I never saw the flag there ever blow like that. It was nonstop. Usually late in the game, it would stop a little bit.”

Ray Burris, Cubs relief pitcher: “When I would drive into the ballpark on Addison Ave., there was a business that had a United States flag on it. I would always check that flag to see which way that wind was blowing. When it was blowing straight toward the expressway, that was good (for pitchers). That meant the wind was blowing straight in from center field to home plate. Now it was going to take a cannon to get that ball out of there, but if it was blowing toward Lake Michigan, oh my goodness. It was unbelievable. That was just the elements you had to deal with.”

Mike Schmidt, Phillies third baseman: “There were days you played at Wrigley Field you couldn’t even think about a home run, wind would be blowing straight in. You could kill a ball and it would barely make the warning track and it’d have no chance. I’ve seen home run balls get caught at shortstop before. That’s what is unique and fun about Wrigley Field. When you get up in the morning and you’re downtown, you know which way the wind is going to blow from the flags on the buildings.”

What I learned:

It’s been one week since the last windy game and here I sit again on the third base line at Field 9. Rain is coming down, the flag is flying straight out and it’s about 38 degrees. The wind is whipping everything in site, the boys are on the field warming up and you would think it was a sunny day the way they are jogging around and yelling, “We love the cold!” I say a silent prayer that the one thing the wind (and coaches) can’t whip away is Zavier’s confidence.

I couldn’t be more grateful to have a destination. To be lucky enough to come and see my son play his last season of high school baseball. All I can do now is pray he plays, plays well, and when (yes, I said when) he hits the ball, I hope the wind is on his side.

Thanks for joining me, I am so grateful to you all-

❤️Lucretia